MUHAMMAD ALI’S MANAGER HAS CONCERNS
April 2nd, 1964
Or I guess I call you Muhammad now, right? That’s going to take a bit of getting used to!
Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love the name change and I completely respect your reasons for adopting it. (And don’t worry about all those t-shirts we had printed up that say 'Every Day is a Cassius Clay Day!', I’ll think of something to do with them).
While I’m completely behind the name alteration and everything it represents (give my best to Malcolm X when you see him, very interesting man), I thought I’d throw a few other name suggestions out there. Not that there’s anything wrong with Muhammad Ali, obviously. I'm sure all those fight fans and the American public in general are going to love it eventually. Your choice is perfect, there's no question about that, but maybe we could come up with something even more perfect? See if any of these alternative names takes your fancy:
Mike Anderson (My personal favourite)
Hans Christian Muhammad
Peter St. Paulson
Mark X. Le Spot (My wife suggested that one)
Muhammad Clay (Split the difference)
Cassius Ali (Ditto, work it in gradually)
Ali Sesame (Kind of along the same lines, but the kids will love it)
Maxie Lougash (Got a real mysterious quality)
The Big Bopper (I think enough time has passed)
The Poet Who Don’t Know It
Mustafa Knockout (See, it’s clever, like you)
Allah B. Dazed
The Unknown Boxer
The Marquis of Queensbury II
Sugar Muhammad Ali (Takes the edge off a bit)
Fistwell Pumpington (Just throwing a few things out there)
The Devout Pugilist
George Washington Jr
Starsley A. Stripeson
Non-Threatening American III
The World’s Greatest Grandpa (Maybe with some make-up? Too gimmicky?)
Any of these take your fancy? If you did spot something on the list that suited, I can have a notary around to your place with all the paperwork in less than 15 minutes at any time of the day or night. Though, obviously, if you want to stick with the whole Muhammad Ali thing, I’m completely behind you. I'm sure it will look great on a marquee.
Frank (or maybe it should be Muhammad Finkelstein now! No, maybe not).